Saturday, April 10, 2010

Dad/Son Learn Together - Pt.1

There are certain moments in your life when ideas, acts, words, etc., are cemented in your brain forever. When you look back on life, there are memorable moments that occurred which served to change your way of thinking about, and responding to, life.

On those occasions, I can remember exactly where I was, the approximate temperature of the moment, the people who were there, and, well, just about everything that helped to imprint the moment in my brain.

I have long been an advocate of ALWAYS attending ALL of your child’s events, whether it’s sports, dance, parent-teacher conferences, Boy Scouts, etc. Sometimes your kids will beg you to be there and other times they will beg you to stay away.

However, irrespective of the spoken words of your children, trust me, THEY WANT YOU TO BE THERE!! The parents who attend the events of their children are the families that most likely have the most well adjusted children, as the kids gain confidence and trust that is needed to succeed in life. Your attendance helps to provide the secure feeling that they need to have to know that they are loved.

Too often, I have seen kids show up at events on their own with no parents before, during, or after the events. The most notable issue in my life was when I managed one of my son’s baseball teams. Practice after practice and game after game, one of the boys rode his bike to the event and, as parents and kids were walking to cars after practices and games, there he was riding his bike home ..... all by himself. How sad!

It was one of saddest displays that I had ever seen. This young man had absolutely zero visible support from his parents. They did not even care enough to show up even once. Despite the efforts of many, this young man eventually grew up to turn to drugs and alcohol, flunked out of community college, and is currently wandering the country, ON HIS OWN, searching for love and answers to life. Perhaps, if his parents had shown an interest in their child by attending his events, he might have grown up to understand that he is loved and supported.

With only a few exceptions, the kids who are loved and supported by their parents are the kids who grow up to be successful in life. The kids who are blown off by their parents are the kids who are most likely to turn to other sources of support, including drugs, alcohol, nefarious friends, gangs, etc.

(Please come back next Saturday for Part 2)

Paul W. Reeves

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