TV - What Is Viewed?

Based upon the research that I discussed last week, I think that we can agree that parents need to monitor the TV programs that are being watched by our children. In order to protect our kids, answer the following questions:

WHY DO YOU HAVE CABLE/SATELLITE TV?
a) Is it because the commercial reception in your home is poor?

b) Is it because you are an avid sports fan and you just have to have ESPN and other such channels?

c) Are you a fan of old movies who enjoys watching AMC?

d) Do you feel that you need to watch the History Channel, or FOX News, CNN, MSNBC, etc.?

If you answered “yes” to any of those questions, then continue on with your Cable/Satellite TV boxes at home. However, you need to remember that your cable box is also filled with MTV, VH-1, E!, BET, and other channels that regularly feature graphic SEX messages, images, and conversations. Based upon informal research, numerous conversations with parents, and practical thinking, my Cable/Satellite TV suggestions are as follows:

1) Get a box that allows you to control the channels that enter your home and then don’t allow any channel that regularly or even occasionally sends the SEX message into your home. These channels not only include MTV, VH-1, BET, E!, but also the pay channels, including HBO, Showtime, Playboy (hopefully, you had already thought to not have that last one in your home with children!), etc. Also, carefully monitor the shows on the other stations as well, as some of them often contain SEX talk and scenes on an intermittent basis.

I try to never allow my kids to watch a show alone or without my prior knowledge on its content. While this might seem to be a bit cumbersome, these are my kids and I will do anything to prevent them from getting the addictive SEX message. As I indicated before, once your kids get the addictive SEX message embedded into their brains, it can do significant damage to their lives, including, but not limited to problems with their family, homework, friends, and relationships with the opposite sex.

OR

2) Do not allow Cable/Satellite TV to come in to your home at all! After all, did you have Cable/Satellite TV when you were a kid? As you are the age of a middle school parent, I am sure that the answer is no (Cable TV didn’t get really big until the early to mid 1980’s). Did you feel deprived? Were you less of a person because you did not have Cable/Satellite TV? Of course, the answer to both questions is also “no”. Clearly, Cable/Satellite TV is not tied to the success of a person, professionally, personally, or parentally! Therefore, if you are unable to lock the SEX-related channels, or if you are unable to monitor your child’s TV viewing, GET RID OF THE CABLE/SATELLITE TV!! Your kids will be infinitely better off and they won’t suffer a from a deprivation malady later in life!

By getting rid of the Cable/Satellite TV in your home, you will be allowing your kids the freedom to get more exercise, spend more time with friends and developing relationships, and you will be taking a giant step toward preventing your children from developing SEX addiction that is permeating the youth of our society.

Yes, let's monitor what our kids watch on TV and keep them safe!


Paul W. Reeves

TV = Pregnancy? - OUCH!!

A significant portion of my interviews with kids and overhearing kids’ conversations with one another have involved television and movie viewing habits. In nearly 100% of the cases, the kids who had watched sexually explicit television shows and movies are the same kids who got involved with sexual activity during their adolescent years.

In an Associated Press article by Lindsey Tanner, recent research from the Rand Corporation indicates that, “Pregnancy rates are much higher among teens who watch a lot of TV with sexual dialogue and behavior than among those who have tamer viewing tastes”. As you might have guessed, “Sex in the City”, “Friends”, and “That 70’s Show”, staples among some adolescents, were some of the shows that were used in the research.

Further, according to the research, “Teens who watched the raciest shows were twice as likely to become pregnant over the next three years as those who watched few such programs”. Sure to illicit further chagrin from parents, the report also indicated that, “Shows that highlight only the positive aspects of sexual behavior without the risks can lead teens to have unprotected sex before they're ready to make responsible and informed decisions. Pregnancies were twice as common among those who said they watched such shows regularly, compared with teens who said they hardly ever saw them. There were more pregnancies among the oldest teens interviewed, but the rate of pregnancy remained consistent across all age groups among those who watched the racy programs”.

The lead researcher for the project, Behavioral Scientist Anita Chandra, said TV-watching was strongly connected with teen pregnancy even when other factors were considered, including grades, family structure and parents' education level.

Tanner reported that Bill Albert, chief program officer at the nonprofit National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy, praised the study and said it "catches up with common sense. Media helps shape the social script for teenagers. Most parents know that. This is just good research to confirm that," Albert said.

Sadly, Tanner wrote that Psychologist David Walsh, president of the National Institute on Media and the Family, cited data suggesting only about 19 percent of American teens say they can talk openly with a trusted adult about sex. “With many schools not offering sex education, that leaves the media to serve as a sex educator," he said. "For a kid who no one's talking to about sex, and then he watches sitcoms on TV where sex is presented as this is what the cool people do, the outcome is obvious," Walsh said. OUCH!!

So, what are your kids watching? What messages are they receiving? Do your kids have extended hours with a television and videos or Cable TV? I will address these issues next week. Stay tuned and … get your kids away from that television!!


Paul W. Reeves

TV/Movies = Sex?

In the mid to late 1960’s, the mere mention of brief nudity or a partially clothed bedroom scene was enough to stir the masses. One little scene was the talk of the town, television and radio talk shows, and newspaper articles!

Well, we’ve come a long way in 40+ years! These days, it’s a real challenge to find a movie that does not contain nudity or sex, whether graphic or implied. Many of the scenes leave nothing to the imagination, and that’s only PG-13 or R movies. A night at the movies with my wife has become a real challenge to avoid such inappropriate scenes. Taking my kids to the movies is much more difficult to do. While I can remember going to the movies several times a year as a kid, my own children might go once or twice per year, as there is simply too much filth that is ready to permeate their brains.

Your children are also heavily influenced by the graphic and implied images that they see in movies, ads for movies, or on the videos that you watch at home. And, yes, the slick producers are able to make these images most enticing to your children.

Further, the print and visual ads for these movies are equally as enticing to your kids. And, of course, peer pressure contributes to your kids’ desire to see these movies. To give you and example of the slick ways that Hollywood slips sexual content into the movies, courtesy of Kids-In-Mind.com, read the following notes of the sexual content in two movies: (see if can you guess the titles of the movie after reading the clues):

*A woman gets the impression that her husband is suggesting that they have sex on their dining room table; she guzzles her wine (and her husband’s) and unbuttons her sweater vest, giggles and says “It’s not even Saturday.”

*A priest ogles a woman in a bikini.

*A woman wears a bikini in a tanning bed, exposing cleavage, bare abdomen and bare legs

*A man pulls his pants down and we see his bare buttock.

*A woman’s low-cut pants show the top of her thong and buttock cleavage, and a woman’s dress reveals cleavage.


If those descriptions were from movies that you and your spouse were to view after the kids went to bed, that would be a choice that you made. However, the descriptions were from a two PG movies entitled, “Christmas with the Kranks” starring Tim Allen and “Freaky Friday”, with Lindsay Lohan (a teen favorite!).

Again, these types of inappropriate sexual content were slipped in comedies, starring everybody’s favorite tool man and a new favorite actress of middle school kids! After all, how could the movies possibly go astray? While I have not actually seen either movie, just those little snippets of sexual content, however brief they may be, are enough for me to know that I do not want my kids exposed to these movies. And, remember, Hollywood has produced these movies to target your child!

If you were not thoroughly disgusted by the content in these reviews (an understandable reaction, as we might have become desensitized to this type of junk), read them a few more times. By the 3rd reading, knowing that these movies were geared specifically for your kids, you just might become sick to your stomach.

Keep an eye on the movies that your kids watch - the sex and nudity can become as addictive as alcohol and drugs for your child!


Paul W. Reeves

TV/Movies - Watch Out!!

Many of the middle school children with whom I have had experience over the past 20 years have seen movies, with their parents’ permission, that would have brought me great trouble from my parents if I had seen them as a youth. And, yes, my own children would receive a consequence if they were to ever watch such inappropriate movies.

However, with the slick ads and peer pressure, the “cool” kids always have to see the “cool” movies. In other words, there is abundant pressure on your kids that, to be “cool” with their peers, they must watch the “cool” movies that are laced with sex and nudity.

As I have previously stated, early interest in sexual images and nudity on the screen can lead to a sexual addiction, whether in minor or major form, wherein kids will begin to crave more and more of the inappropriate movies and perhaps will even attempt to venture toward “R” or “X” movies.

As difficult as it might seem to believe, a significantly high percentage (too high for my taste) of my good students over the years have shared that they have regularly viewed “R” and “X” movies, sometimes with their parents’ knowledge, but mostly without. As I’ve often told my own children and several adolescent children over the years, if you would not watch a particular movie in front of your parents, then don’t watch it alone, because it most likely contains inappropriate elements.

As I further explored this issue with the students, without fail they were able to list several PG-13 movies that they had previously viewed before venturing toward harder material.

Also, without fail, it appears as though the less parental involvement and monitoring of the adolescent child’s behavior, the more often the kids watch movies that are laced with sex and nudity.

Therefore, the challenge and answer to this dilemma are both obvious:

1) DO NOT let your children go to the movies unless you fully understand the content, either by first seeing the movie yourself, checking with trustworthy friends who share your same values and concerns, by reading articles that contain pertinent content information, by watching movie ads that provide clues (the kind of clues that are used to entice our kids!), or by checking websites that specialize in providing you with movie content (such as dove.org., pluggedinonline.com, or kids-in-mind.com).

2) Be careful of the videos that you bring in to your home. As a longtime educator of middle school children, I can tell you this: No matter how clever your hiding places might be, your kids WILL find the videos, watch them, and discuss them with their friends! And, if you have a 5-day rental, they might even share them with their friends! Lesson: If you don’t want your children to watch inappropriate movies, don’t bring them in to your home.

3) Be careful of the movies that you watch in your home. If you are watching a movie that you do not want your child to see, be sure that you view it in closed quarters at a time when they won’t see it. I wish that I had a dollar for each time that a middle school child told me that they saw their parents watching a movie that was filled with sex and nudity. This event usually occurred in the living room or family room after the kids had gone to bed ….. and then sneaked down to watch without their parents’ knowledge! Be careful!

Keep any eye on the movies that your kids view. The sex and nudity can be as addictive as alcohol and drugs for your kids!


Paul W. Reeves