No More Squirt Guns! Pt.2

(Continued from May 29, 2010) ...... Now, again, Kathy and Bill always found quick and easy solutions to any grievances that might have occurred between them, with each attempting to please the other. Robert, of course, took pleasure in having his siblings air their grievances with him all over the house!

So, whatever occurred in front of that mirror on that beautiful school morning, Kathy and Bill exploded into a shouting match aimed at each other! Their parents, getting themselves ready for work in another room, stopped and looked at each other and just listened in shock, as "water and water" verbally and loudly lashed out at each other. One would have never thought that the day of Kathy and Bill arguing over anything, much less engaging in blood curdling screams on an otherwise normal and almost perfect school morning in the home, would ever occur!

The parents shook their heads and chuckled a bit, as the idea of their two kids (previously joined at the hip and only 5 and 11 years old) arguing like the world might end actually seemed a bit cute to them .... at first!

However, the arguing did not stop as soon as it should have for the parents’ pleasure. They jointly decided that it was time to investigate the dispute, have them shake hands or hug, and get over it, even though it was the first mutual dispute of their lives!

Just as the dad was leaving his room to walk down the hallway to the bathroom, Robert was briskly walking up the stairs, hurried past the dad, and announced that he was going to take care of the situation! Actually, the parents were a little surprised that Robert had taken this long to join in the fray. This seemed like the type of scenario for which Robert lived – disputes, arguments, somebody other than him ticked off …. Ah, the perfect scenario made for Robert!

(Please come back next Saturday for the 3rd and final part).


Paul W. Reeves

Bee Stings are Funny? Pt.2

(Continued from May 15, 2010) ...... At some point, I circled back to the van, having escaped most of the bees. I had to time my entry back in to the van with the momentary absence of the bees, so that bees would not get in the van and sting my kids. With the noise of the radio and air conditioning, I assumed that my kids knew nothing about what their dad, the security rock of the family, had just endured, including several bee stings and being chased around the storage yard by the swarms of bees!

As soon as I hurriedly opened the van door to get back in, I reached for my Slurpee to numb the pain from the bee stings … ahhh, that felt good!

I then noticed that my kids were … LAUGHING!! Not the kind of mild chuckle or tee-he in which kids often engage. Oh no, all three of my kids were laughing so hard, that they could barely contain themselves. Their Slurpees were at risk of spilling, their guts were near the bursting level, and I was a little hurt that they were laughing at my predicament.

After they finally stopped laughing (it seemed like hours!), I asked them why they were laughing at the fact that their dad had been majorly stung by bees. Well, they said, they didn’t even know that I had been stung. Rather, their gut-busting laughing ensued because I was radically running around the storage yard and waving my arms at what they thought was thin air! They had assumed that I was just being funny to entertain them, an act which, admittedly, occurred on a regular basis every day at home!

Well, the pain began to subside, I managed to get the trailer hitched up, and off we went back home, whereupon they just couldn’t wait to tell mom of the hilarious hijinks of dad zigzagging all over the storage yard, while wildly flailing his arms at the thin air, then diving in to the van and grabbing his Slurpee to put on his arm.

Of course, they felt bad and they had compassion that I had actually been stung. But, many years later, whenever they retell the story, somehow the actual bee stings get minimized and dad’s seemingly zany antics get magnified and, well, the LAUGHING begins all over again!

So, how about you? Any funny or zany stories that have produced lifelong laughter that you would like to privately share with me? If so, please send them along!


Paul W. Reeves

Bee Stings are Funny? Pt.1

As my own kids were growing up, they looked to me for strength, stability, and confidence (they still do!). As is the case with all families, the more confidence that a parent exudes in everyday life, the more secure the children feel as they go to sleep at night.

As a result of that knowledge, I always tried to be the pinnacle of security and the rock of the family, so that they would feel secure.

Well, their secure feeling and the rock of the family scenario temporarily went belly-up all in one moment, but it wasn’t without a few laughs.

On the night before we were to head to a campground for a couple of weeks, my three kids (at the time their ages were 3, 6, and 9), traveled to the storage yard to retrieve our camper. As was too often the case during our travels, on the way to the yard, we stopped and availed ourselves of Slurpees from 7-11 (little did I know that this would come in handy later!).


After we got to the yard, I backed up the van to the trailer and hopped out of the van to hook up the trailer to the hitch, a routine in which I engaged numerous times. As it was starting to get dark, as my kids were enjoying their Slurpees, and as I did not want them near the hitch in case something fell, I told them to stay in the air-conditioned van while I took care of business, normally a 2-3 minute procedure.

I went through all of the necessary steps toward securing the trailer, but the trailer would not fit over the hitch on the van. I tried to force it down and I gently tried to engage the hitch, but nothing worked. It finally hit me that something must have been up inside of the ball on the hitch, thereby preventing a secure fit.

So, again, with it getting dark, I took my bare hand and reached up inside of the ball of the hitch, unable to see what awaited me. I stuck my bare hand up and in and ..... OUCH!!!!!! …… massive pain engulfed my hand and several hundred bees began to chase me around the storage yard (at least I discovered the hitch problem.)!!

While my kids were relaxing in the cool comfort of the van with their Slurpees, I began to run around the storage yard, batting away bees, dodging bees, and trying to prevent further stinging action, while hoping that they did not notice that their dad was somewhat injured and under attack!

(Please come back next Saturday for the Final part!)


Paul W. Reeves